A relationship in credit

A relationship in credit


keep your balance in credit

Relationships are built on many things;

  • Trust
  • Rapport
  • Understanding
  • Connection

I could go on.


Relationships are maintained through integrity, trust…………by keeping your balance in credit.


Being a leader of team in an organisation you are employed to do a job, you have a role to play, you have KPIs to meet which ultimately link to the organisation’s success, bottom line. So when thinking of your relationships as a leader they too have a level of business nous about them, they too need to turn a profit. They too need to remain in credit for the relationship to continue, to be nourished, to succeed.


Without credit you are trying to build a relationship on false foundations, you are already in debt and this places a different lens on the relationship to one that is in credit.


So how do you establish and maintain a relationship that is in credit?


Work with others in a way that will see your balance remain in credit.


That could be:

  • Get curious to understand others, their needs and expectations;
  • Establish your own expectations of self and others and communicate them;
  • Strategies to wrangle your emotions and have strong and meaningful state management;
  • Deliver on your commitments;
  • Listen and be truly present – nothing worse than having someone check their phone every 5 seconds;
  • Acknowledge your errors and own your actions.


Leadership is about relationships, it is about owning your own actions, attitudes and outcomes. Own your share of your relationships and manage them like a business, keep them in credit.


A classic line from a classic movie – ‘…your ego is writing cheque’s your body can’t cash…’ (Top Gun). Maverick is trying to be the best of the best yet is losing credit from his interactions rather than working for the win/win and achieving credit, which ultimately elevates you to a level of success.


Don’t get me wrong, I love that movie for so many reasons (and no it’s not because of Tom cruise) one being, through challenges you find your best self – Lead self to lead others.


So in building your leadership career, leading your team with confidence, start with strong relationships that are in credit, after all leadership is all about relationships, with the most important one being with yourself.



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Bring balance back to your state

Bring balance back to your state

Every experience gives you something for the next

You walk into the room and you feel like your leadership foundation is unstable, a little shaky. Your hands are a little clammy and the knees are knocking. Why?

It’s time for you to stand up in front of the team and present.

You can be so prepared for situations, information ready, practiced time and time again……..and then – it all feels like its about to fall apart. Your mind starts to wonder, and not to what you need to present, but more to ‘what will they think’, ‘what if I miss something’……………………………

What if you nail it? What if?

You are in charge of your mind and therefore your results.

Emotional intelligence talks about ones’ ability to be aware of their emotions and those of others in the moment and ones’ ability to understand that and manage themselves in that moment, subsequently managing their relationships.

In being aware of not only your emotions in a given situation but your triggers to those emotions you give yourself a greater advantage to develop strategies that will be applicable and resourceful to you. 

What are your go to strategies to support you in this situation, to bring some stability back to your leadership approach and you?

Its time to bring in your reinforcements. Here are 5 tips for bringing some balance back to your state:

  • One deep breath – taking back conscious control of your breathing, and deep breaths, those breathes that fill the diaphragm and bring much needed oxygen to the brain.
  • Situational anchor – many public speakers create a ritual or anchor to bring them into a conscious state of focus, confidence, whatever they need for that activity. Imagine as you walk out to present you step into a sphere of confidence, that takes away your nerves and replaces them with excitement. Something that you carry in your pocket for when the need arises.
  • Ice breaker – engage in a fun activity to lighten the mood and enable everyone to feel settled and ready for your presentation. Ice breakers are fantastic for group and facilitation work, a circuit breaker for the current mood, environment, and mental shift for the next item. You could have a quick quiz (trivial or topical) that adds a little humour, or a picture on screen and ask the team a question related to the picture. Whatever you do, its an opportunity for you to settle into your presentation and for the team to settle into their role as listeners and observers.
  • Focus point – having a point (or person) in the room that you can focus on throughout your presentation to keep you calm and relaxed.
  • Visualisation – just before walking out as you take a deep breath close your eyes and visualise the environment; you standing in front of everyone looking relaxed, comfortable and confident, seeing the audience nodding and smiling, engaging with what you are saying. Bring the colour and sounds to the visualisation – what are you saying to yourself…..’This is my time and I’ve got this’


Whatever your strategy is, it needs to break the current state to give you an opportunity to shift your focus and state to one of stability.


After applying your strategy and successfully presenting to the team, with them engaged and inspired to move forward – take a moment to be IN that moment. Take note of how you are feeling, and what you seeing and hearing. What is the environment like? Take time to reflect and acknowledge your effort, the outcome, and now you have the ingredients for a strategy for your next presentation.


Every experience gives you something for the next. 



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